About Funny Sayings And Quotes
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you don’t notice the air, until someone spoils it.
Don’t drink while driving – you will spill the beer
If you love a woman, you shouldn’t be ashamed to show her to your wife.
Life didn’t work out, but everything else is not that bad.
I feel like Tampax – at a good place, but wrong time…
My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn't be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn't be beauty, so the world needs you after all. -
It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase all doubt. -
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with
If someone notices you with an open zipper, answer proudly: professional habit.
If you’re not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?
FRIDAY is my second favorite F word.
There is a new trend in our office; everyone is putting names on their food. I saw it today, while I was eating a sandwich named Kevin.
The speed of light is when you take out a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on.
To weigh 50 kilos and say that you’re fat, that is so female…
I have been to many places but my goal is to go everywhere.
If Mayans could predict the future, why didn’t they predict their extinction?
Did you know that your body is made 70% of water? And now I’m thirsty.
I know the voices in my head aren't real..... but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome! - h
Most of the time... when you're crying, nobody notices your tears. Most of the time... when you're worried, nobody feels your pain. Most of the time... when you're happy, nobody sees your smile. But when you fart just one time -
If you didn't see it with your own eyes, or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth! -
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself. -
When a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn't then go in through the window. -
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on - htt
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does -
Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up - h
Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits -
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect. -